Forgiveness Can Heal You!

 

Hey guys! Here’s another poem that I’ve written It’s all about forgiveness and my dad.

 

Forgiveness

When I was younger, only a teen, in high school nonetheless

My father’s HD growing relentless

The anger the bitterness, the fear, the shame I felt

Were beginning slowly to eat me away

It only ever held me back

It dragged me down

It grabbed me whole

The darkness feeding away at my soul

Like a giant black hole

It made me feel like my life would never be ok

I felt stuck, stuck because of my dad’s HD

I hated that he had it, that I couldn’t do much to stop it from getting worse

To see him slowly turning into that cursed disease itself

It was hard watching him that way

To see him slowly dying from it day by endless day

Now, now I know better

Now, I am healing and getting stronger,

I deeply and truly forgive my dad

I held onto the pain, the struggle, the hurt for so long

I needed a change

I needed something more, something new to gain

I needed to let go of my past, to let go of what happened to my dad

I know the HD was messing him up, changing the man he’d become

All I ever wanted was for him to be there for me, to be normal and loving

What could I do, he was yelling and screaming at me day and night

I hated being around him, I became resentful of that

Thinking he didn’t really love me, that I wasn’t good enough, and that he hated me

All of these things swirling through my mind

I never knew what to do? I was falling fast and hard.

 

Now all of this all of this strife and anger have flown away

Now, I am happy, relief filling my soul, my heart, and my life

I am living in strength, having survived the worst

Having seen my dad in a new light changed me, it made me see, made me understand that it was never me it was the disease

That he really did love me for me unconditionally

That is what gets me through that is what I needed to finally let my life shine through, the real me is now here and I’m happy

And after feeling so scared, so angry for so long

I know in my heart that I’m safe now, my dad never meant to do any of it

I feel like all of that darkness is drifting, drifting farther and farther away

My life is now free, free of the burdens I have beared for so long

Within me

Now, I can breathe, I can be me

I can do what I love, not in fear, but in happiness

 

Now that I’ve let all of that go I feel like a new person is starting to show

The real me, the one I always wanted to be, not full of anger, resentment or hate,

But in love, understanding, and forgiveness

Letting go, truly truly letting go of the past

Can help you heal & grow

All you must do is work hard and have faith, the faith that things will be ok

If you let go, let go of that life and start fresh, start over from scratch

Its not easy, it never has been it took a long time to get to this place

This place of positivity and grace,

Now my life is full and its all thanks to God for showing me the way!

To a brighter and newer way of being

That I never thought I’d ever achieve

Ever in my wildest dreams

But, here I am and here I am to stay

If I ever lose my way, I know God is with me every step of the way

That gives me peace within my heart

 

-Paula Martin

 

Thanks for reading my poem! I really needed to write this today! I hope you all enjoyed it, or got something out of it like I did! Have a great day! I hope you all know that it is true, forgiveness really does work wonders! So try it out!

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